resolutions

Connect

Join us all month for 31 Days of Organizing for a Better 2010!

Rarely in life do we end up regretting the time we spent connecting with family and friends. If you’re a task-oriented person like me, though, it may sometimes get pushed to the side in favor of checking things off your to-do list.

Today, Marci at Overcoming Busy is talking about evaluating why you want to have an organized home and schedule. Do the time you spend organizing and cleaning reflect your priorities? Whether you struggle to get organized or struggle to put people first, it’s a great reminder to focus on what’s most important!

If your to-do list is full and you’re feeling pulled in too many directions, how do you make time for connecting with family and friends? Let’s look at a few ways to get started:

1. Reassess your schedule and your commitments.

This is probably an obvious step, but if you’re overcommited and struggling to find time for the people you love, take a step back and reassess your commitments. Do your kids each need to be in three activities? Do you need to work overtime every week? Is volunteering in four different ministries at church really the right thing for your family? There are so many opportunities for good things in life, but it’s important to evaluate them and make sure we’re leaving time for the best.

2. Take advantage of the moments you have.

Sometimes circumstances leave us no choice but to work hard or stay busy, which leaves us less time for those we love. How do you make sure you connect with family and friends when you’re time is limited?

:: Make eye contact. This is something I am trying to get better at with my own girls. Sometimes I’m so focused on getting the laundry done or finishing the dishes or completing a work task that I try to hold a conversation with them while doing something else, and they’re smart enough to know I’m not really focusing on them when I do that. It’s amazing how much difference taking a second to get down on their level and make eye contact makes in the rest of our day.

:: Take advantage of car rides. Because we live 30-45 minutes outside of “town”, we spend at least an hour in the car together every week, and I especially love to use that time to connect with my husband after a busy week. We talk about important things, silly things and everything in between. Sometimes, when we have a longer drive, we’ll make up icebreaker questions to ask each other, such as, “What was your most embarrassing moment in high school?” It’s a fun way to connect and make the most of our time in the car.

:: Go somewhere. During the warmer months, simply going outside where there are less things to distract me is a great way to focus on my girls without the distraction of chores and work and my to-do list. Similarly, going somewhere like a museum or the zoo is a way to get out of your everyday rut and just enjoy time together.

3. Turn off the technology.

This one deserves its own category. If you’ve fallen into the routine of constantly checking your email on your computer or iPhone, take some time to think about how that makes the people around you feel. This is a huge trap of technology — and one that I personally struggle with — and I’m trying to do better about closing my laptop during certain parts of our day to just focus on my family without the distraction of email or IM.

Technology is good. I love it, and I’m thankful for the role it plays in our lives today. But balance is key, and a question that I often think about is this: Do my children think my laptop/email/work are more important than them? Although saving all computer work for times when my girls are sleeping isn’t possible, I want to make sure my attention is focused on them when it should be so that the times when I have to work don’t make them feel less important or less loved.

4. Add it to your calendar.

When it comes to connecting with friends and extended family, sometimes the hardest part is simply getting a get together on the calendar. Make plans to spend time together, even if you’re planning a month or two in advance, to make sure that it doesn’t get put off by the busyness of life. It doesn’t matter if you plan a play date, invite a friend over for coffee or sign up for a small group — just make sure you actually schedule a time and a date so that it actually happens.

Are you a people-oriented person or a task-oriented person? What ways can you focus on connecting more with your family and friends in 2010?

The 31 Days of Organizing for a Better 2010 series is sponsored by Get Organized Wizard. Find ideas, prompts and suggestions to motivate you to change in the Life & Goal Organizer.

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31 Days of Organizing for a Better 2010: Limit Screen Time

Join us all month for 31 Days of Organizing for a Better 2010!

As a work-at-home mom, I’ll admit that my kids sometimes watch more TV than I’d like, especially during the cold winter months. To be honest, I’m not completely against TV. I’ve seen my girls play for hours with an idea sparked by something they watched, and they’ve all learned their phonics through LeapFrog’s Letter Factory. However, I do think the key is moderation, and it’s something that is a constant struggle for us to find that balance.

Maybe you limit your children’s TV time but find yourself watching hours each night and want to limit your own as well. Today, Sherri from Zen Family Habits is sharing her own story of turning off the TV and some tips for making it an easier transition. Although I usually do something while watching TV so that the time isn’t completely wasted, I’m inspired by her post to turn it off more often in the evenings as well.

Whether you’re looking to limit your children’s TV viewing or your own, here are my tips, from the trenches, on limiting screen time within your family:

1. Track how much you watch.

It always helps to start by tracking and writing down how much TV you’re actually watching. It can be motivating to see that number in writing and realize how often it gets turned on for just a few minutes and then left on indefinitely. When it comes to my own TV viewing, thinking about how much I could get done in the amount of time I spend watching TV is also motivating, even if I do try to multitask when it is on.

2. Set actual limits.

Think about your family’s situation and decide what your limits actually are. I know from experience that just saying we want to “watch less TV” rarely works; we need to set limits on what that actually means. At my house, our goal is two half-hour blocks a day — one in the morning and one in the evening, with one of those being an educational show like the LeapFrog movies mentioned above or a DVD from Planet Earth — plus one full-length movie a week. It may be that your goal is only to watch TV on the weekends or to only watch one movie a day. Really think about what you want those limits to be and define them in a way that is measurable.

3. Try a TV turn-off week.

Sometimes when we get stuck in a rut of watching too much TV, I declare a TV turn-off week altogether. Knowing that the TV is not an option makes my girls less whiny about wanting to watch it, which makes it easier to leave it off. Having it off for a whole week can also break the habit of turning it on because of boredom. It forces us to think outside the box for activities, crafts and games to keep us busy.

4. Use tokens/points.

A system I’d really like to start using for TV time as well as computer and video games (which my girls are really just starting to play) is a token system where each token entitles them to so much time watching TV or playing a game. A token system takes you out of the equation as the bad guy. It also teaches kids to monitor their own time and make decisions about when they want to use it.

5. Watch movies instead of TV.

One of the reasons we prefer DVDs over the TV is that it’s so easy to just leave the TV on after one show is done. Before you know it you’ve  been watching TV for an hour or more. On the other hand, when a movie ends, it ends, and we usually only last so long with the repeating music on the splash screen before we turn it off. Another alternative is to record shows on the DVR and watch those so that, like a movie, it actually ends, which becomes a built-in reminder to turn off the TV.

6. Make a list of other activities.

As Sherri mentions in her post as well, a list of alternative activities is key. In order to limit your family’s TV viewing, you need to have a list of alternative activities ready to choose from. This should be a combination of activities the kids can do on their own as well as ones you do with them, but have enough ideas to get you through a week so that when the boredom sneaks in you’re not tempted to turn on the TV out of habit. Include crafts, games, baking, toy sets and outdoor activities.

7. Unplug the TV.

I’ve found that physically unplugging the TV emphasizes our commitment to watching less and makes us less likely to turn it on as a boredom buster. Unfortunately, we use our TV for music pretty much all day — either turning on an XM channel or putting CDs in the stereo — but I want to get a separate stereo that we can use that when we want to keep the TV off.

Is limiting screen time one of your goals for 2010? What have you tried in the past? What are you going to try this time?

The 31 Days of Organizing for a Better 2010 series is sponsored by Get Organized Wizard. Find ideas, prompts and suggestions to motivate you to change in the Life & Goal Organizer.

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More Than Resolutions: Intentionally Parent

January 10, 2010
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Join us all month for 31 Days of Organizing for a Better 2010! As parents, it’s easy to fall into the rut of simply reacting to life rather than intentionally approaching parenthood. With four children five years old and under, I know what that’s like! In fact, this is our top goal for 2010, that [...]

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More Than Resolutions: Take More Pictures

January 9, 2010

Join us all month for 31 Days of Organizing for a Better 2010! Do you take a lot of pictures of your kids? When our oldest was born, we lived, literally, on the other side of the country from our entire family, so we got into the habit of taking lots of pictures from the [...]

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More Than Resolutions: More Crafts and Activities

January 7, 2010
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Join us all month for 31 Days of Organizing for a Better 2010! The start of a New Year is a great time to evaluate your goals and priorities as parents, and a fairly common resolution is to take the time to do more crafts, play more games and just spend quality, focused time with [...]

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More Than Resolutions: Read More

January 5, 2010

Join us all month for 31 Days of Organizing for a Better 2010! Reading is a great way to relax and unwind while sharpening our minds and challenging our perspectives, and it’s worth making it a priority in our lives. When I was in high school and college, I never could have imagined that I’d [...]

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More Than Resolutions: Improve Your Marriage

January 4, 2010
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Join us all month for 31 Days of Organizing for a Better 2010! Whether your marriage is struggling, surviving or thriving, there’s always room for improvement. It’s interesting that this is not actually a very popular resolution. Too many marriages stay stuck in a “good enough” rut without realizing that marriage can become more beautiful [...]

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